Self Confidence – Who Holds The Key?

By: Chris Pace

As many of you know I am a big fan of Simon Sinek. He has a way of cutting through the clutter and exposing the very heart of his topics. The following short video is no exception as he zeroes in on the importance of self-confidence in life and how fragile it can be when abused. It is a simple but effective message.

Sinek, as usual, does a terrific job of extracting the humanity from the often-callous workplace. I don’t mean callous in the sense of hostile or insensitive, but rather that the workplace often takes us out of our comfort zone into a realm of systems and processes. This is an area that can engage us in activities that are often counterintuitive to our normal human behavior. What makes this short clip so meaningful is that he doesn’t downgrade the process – he alludes to a process that doesn’t add up – and then takes a step towards empathy when he seeks to provide a solution for the person first, not the problem.

In the workplace, we often are met with frustrations that cause us anxiety and disappointment as problems arise. This will never change… life is inherently full of conflict and challenging obstacles. What can change is how we choose to provide a solution to these events as they happen. In this instance, Sinek states that he addressed the person with the problem as a root-cause issue as opposed to challenging the integrity of the person that likely caused it.

What can we learn from this?

Here are a few points you should consider as we explore the psychology of self-confidence in individuals.

1. Solve for the right variable. You might have thought that algebra would never be used after high school. Ideologically, you were wrong. When you consider each problem as an algebraic equation, you find that when you introduce an order of operations solving for the right variable is key. In Sinek’s case, he chose the variable most intimately involved in moving forward towards solving the entire question.

In this case, let’s call the employee (X) and call the process variable involved (Y). If you remember anything about algebra, you’ll know that solving for X is always the first step. That allows you to distill the other parts of the problem allowing you to find the answer to the equation, the Y variable. When we try to solve for Y first, we end up with an unknown at the end (what is X?) and inadvertently, we never really solve the equation…we just throw the process into an unending doom loop.

• Consider the unknown. We all have a history. That history controls and guides us subconsciously, affecting much of our inherent behavior. When we stop to consider the human element of leading people, we start to understand that employees are not the sum of their tasks, they are the compilation of their experience. As leaders, when we stop and empathize with our people, we start building trust. With that trust, we build engagement and with engagement (you guessed it!) we get genuine productivity. By addressing the person and not the process, we demonstrate and reinforce safety within the organization. That safety is what allows humanity in your organization to thrive, which ultimately results in an intent-driven culture where everyone works together to drive mutually beneficial success.

• The road to hell is NOT paved with good intentions, the road to SUCCESS is. There is an old adage about being naïve that I simply don’t buy. When we have genuine “good” intentions and we exist in a safe, supportive environment… even failure is a step forward. Whether it’s because we learn from mistakes or earn our grit, we must consider that those good intentions are pavers on the road to success. When you, as a leader, model that behavior and support your team in this process, their simple intent turns into operational and cultural excellence. Those successes move the needle forward.

• HEAD. HEART. HANDS is the triad of power. When teams are able to think of new innovations and share their ideas, we’re using our HEAD. When we engage this process with a HEART of support and safety, we engage the soul of the business and enrich our culture. And finally, when we seek to streamline processes and remove redundancies, we allow our HANDS to work freely in pursuit of excellence.

So… as you seek to refine your 2020 plans for driving success in your organization, consider the points above. Are you allowing your team to be as successful as they can be because of their unique abilities to be themselves or are you simply hoping the plug and play model of systems will offer enough liberty in execution that you scrounge out a few wins? Make no mistake, wins can be found on both sides of the aisle. In the end, successful and long-lasting organizations are not built on infrequent success, but on the compounding success of a culture that thrives on letting everyone be their authentic self. This means you may have to spend extra time, attention, and compassion on helping them get there